Candy Jackson 50 лет

Login with Linkedin

You're ready to proceed to the next step in creating a LinkedIn login. We develop a great for FREE.

Select a Password for your account. Step 1 First, you need to create an empty MVC application. Download Download login with LinkedIn example.

Login with Linkedin - Login with LinkedIn feature makes web login system completed. To prevent fraudulent transactions during the authentication process, we will only communicate with URLs that you have identified as trusted endpoints.

Login with LinkedIn feature makes web login system completed. It provides an easy and quick way to sign in to the web application without creating an account on that web application. Using LinkedIn login, the users can log into your website with their LinkedIn account without register in your website. Our earlier tutorial showed you the. In this tutorial, we will show you how to integrate LinkedIn login system in CodeIgniter. Before you get started to implement LinkedIn login in CodeIgniter 3 using OAuth Client Library, create a LinkedIn app in LinkedIn Developer Network panel and get the API Key Client ID and API Secret Client Secret. Also, need to specify the Redirect URL, API Key, and API Secret in your script at the time of connecting with LinkedIn API. Take a look at the files structure of Login with LinkedIn in CodeIgniter using PHP client library. Database Table Creation To store the LinkedIn profile information, you need to create a table into the database. The following SQL creates a users table with some required fields in MySQL database. It will be a good idea to specify these libraries in the autoload. All files including LinkedIn OAuth Client Library are included into the Source Code package, download it and place the files into the CodeIgniter application. Are you want to get implementation help, or modify or extend the functionality of this script?

Once the user has accepted the request and provided their LinkedIn piece credentials, the window will be dismissed and the SDK will perform the back-end call to LinkedIn to silently complete the authentication process for you. So, here we go for creating an app in Google account. The value of the header should be a comma separated list ofsolo from login with linkedin to lowest priority of preference. GetResponse as HttpWebResponse { System. When a user clicks the sign in button, a pop-up window containing the LinkedIn authentication dialog will be presented. It's also important to give back and help your connections when they need advice and referrals — is about building relationships rather than just asking for assistance, and it works both ways. See to ensure that your application is requesting the correct member permissions for this API call during the OAuth 2. We got code and state parameter in response. Download Sin login with LinkedIn example. This value must be kept secure, as per your agreement to the. Once you've either gone through the email address or skipped over it, a confirmation screen displays to let you know that a confirmation email has been sent to the email account you north registered with LinkedIn.

It also offers private mailboxes where you can share your personal information with your mate. People can find all kinds of possibilities within this website.

It is not so convenient to operate the profile and change its user name and password. This one also has just 'http'! Not bad, I think.

- It enables you to search potential mates as you can chat with the woman or man you meet online. A feature called Your Matches creates a list of compatible, potential dates.

The Best Dating Sites for Over 50 Reviews Last update: Feb 27, 2018 Reviews of the best dating sites for over 50 singles to find love online. Over 50 dating seems like a challenge for most of the older singles. The reason is that society is not ready to accept the fact that someone at an older age can even think about online dating. In the same way, most of the people are so much free time that they spend most of it taunting the older individuals instead of doing something productive. In order to resolve this issue a lot of over 50 dating sites have been developed. It provides the older people the chance to break the norms of society and for once enjoy their lives the way they want. There are many over 50 dating sites available online that it often gets tough to select the best one. This is the reason that most of the singles are looking for expert help. Here we have the comparison of top 5 dating sites that you should consider using. With the passage of time, the site was upgraded to assure that the users will have the best online dating experience. The biggest attraction of the website is that it is perfect for over 50 singles that are ready to date. Here you will find a new way to chat, meet and connect with the individuals that you would like to date in future. You can quickly find your match and enjoy dating.... Senior Match is one of the best senior dating sites for over 50 that has been developed with the goal to assure that no one has to live alone. Even the over 50 singles will get the authority to select the type of partner and relationship that they want to have. Over 50 singles can select between the options of Dating and relationships, Companionship, Travel Mates, Activity patterns. You can select the services you are most comfortable with. SeniorMatch will have you find the best partner.... Here you will have to answer a few questions that will help the website understand the type of person you are and which type of partner will be the best for you. Once you have found the right once you can start chatting. When you think that the person you are talking to is perfect, you can ask him or her out on a date. The biggest attraction of eharmony is that it will allow you to find a date in your locality.... If you are serious about dating and you are not interested in some general hookups then EliteSingles is the site that you should join. Here you will get the services like Intelligent matchmaking, Meet eligible partners. Your success rate will be high. There is no chance that you will be left alone once you are on EliteSingles. It is free to use and you will find hundreds of people that would be available to date.... OurTime will provide you the opportunity to find the eligible over 50 singles near you. There is a free application available that will allow you to use the dating site wherever you like. Once you have connected with the right person you can meet then offline. We always try and bring a clear and complete picture of all the dating websites on your plate so that at this mature yet sensitive age, you don't suffer from pitfalls of online dating. There are some other dating sites for over 50 singles. These 8 websites may have potential count of members but does all of that quantity and convenience equal quality? Silver singles is another over 50 dating site that promotes the concept of online dating for older singles. People can find all kinds of possibilities within this website. If you are looking for friendship, long term commitment etc. Chat rooms make it possible for you to interact with potential mates thus you can determine whether the potential mate matches your preferences or not. It also offers private mailboxes where you can share your personal information with your mate. The membership options on this website are pretty expensive in terms of membership base. It allows posting a profile and a picture, taking personality test and such aspects which help in building a strong profile. The quality of its features might be high but they don't prove to be useful as it has approximately half the membership base. Also, the website is not protected by SSL which means that all communications between browser and website are not encrypted. Online dating can work for older singles over 50 years of age, as there is not an age limit to fall in love or to experiment with one's life. There are many sites over the Internet that is designed specifically to promote the idea of online dating for older singles. Investing anything in this website is like a waste, DatingforSeniors guarantees cooling period of 14 days but that is all fake. Premium membership of this website for gaining access to multitude of features is not worth investing because those features hardly add anything potential to your dating profile. This is the reason that it fails to retain any sort of members and is thus not recommended. Stitch is an online over 50 dating site for singles to find their soul mate once again. It enables you to search potential mates as you can chat with the woman or man you meet online. The registration on this website is absolutely free, which means that people belonging to any class can access this site to find their soul mate. While the interface and idea of catering the entire spectrum from friendship to romance is unique in Stitch. Also, their unique idea reduces the chance of finding dates as someone might just be in friend zone. Along with this its customer service is pathetic and thus you really don't get to stitch with them! Layout of website is not so user friendly. It is not so convenient to operate the profile and change its user name and password. Also, like other top websites, the scientific algorithms to find perfect match are not so impressive and thus it lacks on feature front even if it is secure. This one also has just 'http'! We couldn't find stringent registration norms on these websites and thus data privacy is at risk. The website could have invested more towards web encryption and privacy policies. Also, its focus is to mint money and thus it renews your membership much before the previous one expires. With small user base and no unique features it doesn't make sense to opt for its 'endless' membership! This is a newly setup website in this world of online dating and thus suffer from various anomalies. It doesn't have a huge user base and thus before paying for its services, you should check the registered users. Many old people who are single often wonder that whether online dating can enable them to find their loved one or not. At the age of 50, many people wish to settle down if they are not settled yet, however, many old people that have lost their companion also wish to find true love once again. Many singles look for companions in order to share their joy and sorrow with someone. Companionship is very important for people at the age of 50 as life becomes stable and stagnant at that point in time, therefore, they look for someone who can give them company throughout the day and can show affection and care towards them.

He works close by and we arrange to meet. It provides the older people the chance to break the norms of society and for once enjoy their lives the way they want. It enables you to search potential mates as you can chat with the del or man you meet online. At 50 and up, you are at the prime of your life. Also, its focus is to mint money and thus it renews your membership much before the previous one expires. The biggest attraction of the website is that it is perfect for over 50 elements that are ready to date. Also, like other top websites, the scientific algorithms to find perfect match are not so impressive and thus it lacks on feature front even if it is secure. free over 50s dating sites

Best Online Dating Sites & Services

Caters to all audiences. Christian Mingle Originally called Engage, Christian Mingle merged with the aforementioned site in 2009 after Spark Networks bought it out. These are keyword searches, mutual matching, reverse matching, the ability to save and favorite certain profiles and more.

Check to see what safeguards are put in place by the site, and which ones you can enable to limit those who sees your profile. Currently Baby boomers, those over 50, are overwhelmingly turning to the web to find a mate. Premium membership enables activity reports, read receipts, extra beans.

Best Online Dating Sites & Services - Alumni cannot initiate or respond to contact or post status updates.

These aren't necessarily the , although many of them do show up on both lists. No, these sites are the most popular, meaning more people visit these online dating sites on a monthly basis. Although this list can change every few months, the biggest of the bunch usually stay the same. So if you're looking for an online dating site that offers the most active members, in all parts of the world with biggest features and most active forums, these are your best places to start. Continue to 2 of 8 below. The largest of the free dating sites, POF boasts an estimated 23 million unique members using the site every month. While owner Markus Frind has wiped the site of folks only looking for or an , I've found this has only increased the incidence of folks lying about their age or intentions. Still, it's a great site to get your feet wet in the online dating world, just to see what's out there and how the process works. Continue to 3 of 8 below. Zoosk hosts an estimated 11. Having said that, I've found a larger-than-average number of folks looking only for something casual here likely due to the lack of time investment needed to join , and I've yet to hear of any successful relationships come out of the site where readers tell me they've met The One, or something equally special, on the site. I freely admit that I'm biased when it comes to OkCupid, as it's taken my top spot on my list for years now. I still love it, and highly recommend it to all singles and polyamorous couples looking for love, friendship, or even something a bit more casual. With just over 10 million unique monthly users, it's not the largest of the dating sites although it is owned by Match. Continue to 5 of 8 below. With just over seven million unique monthly users, eHarmony is the largest dating site focused exclusively on heterosexual, long-term partnerships that hopefully lead to marriage. Their free hour-long test is fascinating to help you determine compatibility markers, however, there's zero way to tell if the person you're matched with also has an account, and therefore can reply to your questions. Christian Mingle Originally called Engage, Christian Mingle merged with the aforementioned site in 2009 after Spark Networks bought it out. Continue to 7 of 8 below. While I found the site cluttered and confusing to use, they're obviously doing something right with three million unique members visiting every month. People Media The only site specifically geared to the largest demographic group on the planet at this time 50+ , and the second niche site on this list, OurTime has a lot to offer senior singles.

Largest dating websites custodes himself on being a New Media Futurist and can be reached at LinkedIn. Retrieved 28 February 2015. Free Dating site based upon pre-screening using. Non-free Profile-based dating website for gay and bisexual men, women, and couples. Christian Mingle Originally called Engage, Christian Mingle merged with the aforementioned idea in 2009 after Spark Networks bought it out. You should never personally meet with someone, unless you already know each other well. Amy Giberson, now 34, was reluctant to try internet dating again but she decided to give it one more shot in 2014. Non-free application met on Android and iOS. Anyone struggling to find a partner in their day to day life A 2013 study shows that nearly 60% of all new marriages in the USA started with the couple meeting online.

السياحة في البوسنة والهرسك

تضم باكو عاصمة اذربيجان أيضًا عدَّة متاحف مثل: متحف باكو للفنون المُعاصرة، ومتحف أذربيجان الوطني للتاريخ، اللذان يعرضان أعمالًا فنيَّة وتحف أثريَّة على التوالي. هذا الموقع يستخدم Akismet للحدّ من التعليقات المزعجة والغير مرغوبة. زر النفق الذي أنقذ سراييفو: تخيل الوجود في مدينة محاصرة بالقنابل والرصاص، حيث يتساقط القتلى كل يوم، مع عدم وجود طاقة كهربية أو طريقة للحصول على الدفء في شتاء البلقان القارس، كل ذلك يصاحبه قلة في الموارد سواء طعام أو ماء، وعدم القدرة على التواصل مع باقي العالم، ولا أسلحة للدفاع عن النفس، تلك كانت حياة أهالي سراييفو خلال الحرب الأهلية.

حتعمل إيه بقى، ثقافتهم كدة ٦- محظورات لو إنت متجوز في بلدك وعايز تتجوزها كزوجة تانية، بلاش تتقدملها أحسن، لأن دة بالنسبالهم ممنوع منعاً باتاً! وللأسف الشعب البوسنوي واخد فكرة عن العرب انهم بيتجوزوا أربعة وبيحبسوا ستاتهم في البيت وكدة، فحاول تغير إنت الفكرة دي. وقد دُمِر الجسر أثناء الحرب الكرواتية البوسنية في تسعينات القرن الماضي وقد أُعيد إنشاؤه وافتُتح في عام 2004.

السياحة في البوسنة والهرسك - على الرغم من ذلك، يُلاحظ أنَّ باكو تتميز عن غيرها من المدن ذات المُناخ المُشابه من ناحية أنَّها لا تُعاني من صيفٍ شديد الحرارة، ويُعزى ذلك إلى موقعها الشمالي على دائرة العرض ولوقوعها على شبه جزيرة على شاطئ بحر قزوين. شتاءُ المدينة بارد وقليل الرطوبة، ويصل مُتوسط درجات الحرارة خلال شهريّ يناير وفبراير إلى 4.

كل هذا تغير في أوائل التسعينات، حيث وقعت سراييفو في حصار الـ 1000 يوم من القوات الصربية، وحين خسر الاف من الرجال والسيدات والأطفال حياتهم، سواء بسبب الرصاص الذي يضرب المدينة طوال الوقت، أو الشتاء القارص دون استخدام الكهرباء، أو قلة الطعام والماء، ومنذ انتهاء الحرب وأصبحت سراييفو أسرع المدن نمواً في البوسنة والهرسك، لتستعيد أمجادها وتصبح من أهم عواصم أوربا، ومنارة ثقافية حقيقة، ويزورها كل عام المزيد من السياح، ونقدم لكم هنا 10 أشياء لتقوم بها في سراييفو. الاماكن السياحية في سراييفو هناك العديد من الاماكن السياحية في سراييفو المميزة في سراييفو ولذلك سنقدم لكم في هذا الموضوع نبذة مختصرة عن الاماكن السياحية في سراييفو والانشطة التي يمكنك القيام بها اثناء تواجدكم في سراييفو. قم بجولة بحي باسكارسيبا: باسكارسيبا هو الحي القديم الموجود في قلب مدينة سراييفو وأحد اجمل الاماكن السياحية في سراييفو ، ومكان لقاء السكان المحليين، وهو بذات الشكل منذ القرن الخامس عشر عندما تم بنائه. وشوارع هذا الحي الضيقة مرصوفة بالأحجار وعلى الجانبين المتاجر والمقاهي، وأحد أقدم شوارع الحي هو Kazandžiluk أي النحاسيين، والذي يحتوي على الكثير من المنتجات المصنعة يدوياً من النحاس، مثل أطقم القهوة، وهو كذلك أفضل مكان يمكنك أن تحصل فيه على طاقم القهوة البوسنية التقليدية، أو أي تذكارات نحاسية أخرى. ويوجد كذلك السبيل في منتصف الحي، وهو واحد من رموز سراييفو، والمعروف بميدان الحمائم، حيث محاط دوماً بهم، ويمكن أن تطعمهم بنفسك عن أحببت، وقد تم بناء هذا السبيل عام 1753 ثم تم تدميره عام 1891 وأُعيد بنائه عام 1913. زيارة مسجد الغازي خسرو بك: تم بناء مسجد غازي خسرو بك في سراييفو عام 1532 على يد المعماري العثماني Acem Esir Ali، وتم تمويله من حكومة الغازي خسرو بك، وقد كان أول مسجد في العالم الذي تدخله الكهرباء عام 1989، وواحد من أهم المباني الإسلامية في البوسنة. من الاماكن السياحية في سراييفو مبنى البلدية Vjecnica تم بناء هذا المبنى في الفترة ما بين عام 1892 -1894، ليصبح مبنى البلدية والمكاتب الحكومية والإدارية، ثم تم تحويله إلى مكتبة قومية بنهاية الحرب العالمية الثانية، وهو واحد من أهم المباني من فترة الحكم النمسا — المجر للبوسنة والهرسك. التسوق في Bezistan: Bezistan سوق مسقوف تم بنائه عام 1555بالقرب من مسجد الغازي خسرو بك، وهو مصمم بعدة مداخل في بدايته ومنتصفه، بطول 109 م، ويحتوي على الكثير من المتاجر الصغيرة التي يمكنك ان تتسوق فيها الحقائب، والتذكارات والمجوهرات، والساعات، والنظارات الشمسية، وقد تم بنائه على يد الإمبراطورية العثمانية بنفس تصميم المساجد. زر المكان الذي بدأت فيه الحرب العالمية الأولى: من اشهر الاماكن السياحية في سراييفو هو المكان الذي بدأت فيه الحرب العالمية الأولى حيث منذ حوالي مائة عام يوم 28 يونيو عام 1914 قام جريفلو برينسب وهو شاب بوسني في الثامنة عشر من عمره بقتل الأرشيدوق فرانز فريدناند، وريث عرش النمسا، وزوجته صوفي في سراييفو. في الصورة بالأعلى يظهر الجسر اللاتيني، حيث في شمال هذا الجسر وقف القاتل الشاب، ويوجد هناك متحف أرخ لهذا اليوم مع منحوتة لموضع قد برينسب، وبعد هذا الاغتيال اشتعلت الحرب العالمية الأولى التي راح ضحيتها 16 مليون شخص. شاهد غروب الشمس من الحصن الأصفر: من أجمل الأماكن التي يمكن ان تزورها في سراييفو الحصن الأصفر، حيث يمكنك أن تشاهد غروب الشمس على المدينة، إنها لحظة رائعة مفهمة بالجمال والرومانسية، ويمكنك ان تتسلق التل، لتشاهد النصب التذكاري، أو تأخذ تاكسي إلى الأعلى مباشرة، ولكن التسلق والمشي لأعلى كانت تجربة رائعة. استمتع بالقهوة والحلوى والطعام البوسني: البوسنيون يحبون قهوتهم وحلواهم، لذلك انصحك بتجربة الكثير من المقاهي والمطاعم التي تعتبر رخيصة بالنسبة لباقي دول أوروبا، وبالقرب من مسجد الغازي خسرو ستجد الكثير منها، والتي يمكنك ان تتناول فيها القهوة، والشكولاتة الساخنة، والمشروبات المنعشة شاهد المدينة من أعلى برج أفاز: لو أردت مشاهدة المدينة من أعلى نقطة ممكنة، إذا يجب عليك أن تزور برج أفاز احد اهم الاماكن السياحية في سراييفو. وهو برج بارتفاع 176 مع قمة من الزجاج الأزرق، ويقدم مشهد رائع للمدينة، والجبال التي تحيط بها، كل ذلك مقابل مارك واحد للدخول، وهناك كذلك مقهى حيث يمكنك تناول المشروبات الساخنة والباردة أو كريب النوتيلا، وانصحك بزيارتين لهذا المكان، مرة في الصباح لتشاهد مدى عظمة سراييفو، وأخرى وقت غروب الشمس، لمشاهدة المدينة المتوهجة. زر النفق الذي أنقذ سراييفو: تخيل الوجود في مدينة محاصرة بالقنابل والرصاص، حيث يتساقط القتلى كل يوم، مع عدم وجود طاقة كهربية أو طريقة للحصول على الدفء في شتاء البلقان القارس، كل ذلك يصاحبه قلة في الموارد سواء طعام أو ماء، وعدم القدرة على التواصل مع باقي العالم، ولا أسلحة للدفاع عن النفس، تلك كانت حياة أهالي سراييفو خلال الحرب الأهلية. أستمر هذا الحصار لمدة ثلاث سنوات وأربعة شهور وعشرة أيام، حيث انقطعت هذه المدينة عن باقي البلاد، وقد كان الحل الوحيد للتعايش هو حفر النفق الذي سُمي بعد ذلك نفق الأمل ونفق الحياة، والذي استطاعت بفضله المدينة ان تتعايش مع هذا الحصار القاسي. زيارة المتاحف : للأسف المتحف القومي للبوسنة والهرسك الذي تم بنائه عام 1888 تم اغلاقه عام 2012، ويحتوي هذا المتحف على العديد من الأثار الهامة من عصور مختلفة منها أقدم دستور يهودي تم نشره في برشلونة عام 1350، والكثير من المخطوطات والوثائق الأخرى، والمعروضات في كل من مجالات الفن والتاريخ، والطبيعية. شاركونا رأيكم حول الاماكن السياحية في سراييفو وهل من اقتراحات باماكن جديدة لم نقم بذكرها في هذا الموضوع ؟ اترك تعليقاً لن يتم نشر عنوان بريدك الإلكتروني. أعلمني بالمواضيع الجديدة بواسطة البريد الإلكتروني. هذا الموقع يستخدم Akismet للحدّ من التعليقات المزعجة والغير مرغوبة.

اه بالمناسبة، الستات البوسنويات بشكل عام معروفين انهم ستات بيوت من الدرجه الأول، يعني ماتقلقش من النقطة دي. بالإضافة إلى عرض الكراسي بتخفيض بنسبة 50% للعروض المسائية التي لم تحجز خلال اليوم. بوجيتيلي: هي قرية جميلة في بلدية كابليينا في البوسنة والهرسك، وتعد الحياة الليلية في البوسنة المراكز الحضرية في البلاد التي حافظت على طابعها الخاص رغم الأطوار التاريخية المختلفة والدمار الواسع أثناء حرب الاستقلال البوسنية. طبعاً دة مش معناه انها بتقبل بأي حاجة عشان مش لاقية عرسان مثلاً، بل لأنها عايزه ترتبط بيك وبتقبل باللي إنت تقدر عليه. باكو مدينةٌ متمازجة الثقافة، فهي من ناحية مدينة ذات طابع أوروبي غربي، ومن ناحية أخرى مدينة ذات طابع إسلامي شرقي، وأبرز ما يدل على ذلك هو طرز العمارة المتنوِّعة، فالمباني العائدة للعهد الروسي يطغى عليها الطراز الأوروبي، وتلك السابقة لهذا العهد يغلب عليها الطابع الإسلامي، ترى حارات المدينة القديمة المسوَّرة ضيِّقة تشبه حارات كثيرة ضيقة في مدن عربية وإسلامية شرقية، وقصورها مُزيَّنة ومزخرفة بالنقوش والآيات القرآنيَّة التي رسمت بالخط العربي. استمتع بالقهوة والحلوى والطعام البوسني: البوسنيون يحبون قهوتهم وحلواهم، لذلك انصحك بتجربة الكثير من المقاهي والمطاعم التي تعتبر رخيصة بالنسبة لباقي دول أوروبا، وبالقرب من مسجد الغازي خسرو ستجد الكثير منها، والتي يمكنك ان تتناول فيها القهوة، والشكولاتة الساخنة، والمشروبات المنعشة شاهد المدينة من أعلى برج أفاز: لو أردت مشاهدة المدينة من أعلى نقطة ممكنة، إذا يجب عليك أن تزور برج أفاز احد اهم الاماكن السياحية في سراييفو. على الرغم من ذلك، يُلاحظ أنَّ باكو تتميز عن غيرها من المدن ذات المُناخ المُشابه من ناحية أنَّها لا تُعاني من صيفٍ شديد الحرارة، ويُعزى ذلك إلى موقعها الشمالي على دائرة العرض ولوقوعها على شبه جزيرة على شاطئ بحر قزوين. يندر وقوع العواصف الثلجيَّة في المدينة، وعندما تحصل لا يدوم الثلج أكثر من بضعة أيَّام قبل أن يذوب. بالنسبالهم دة الطبيعي، زي ماهو طبيعي لو اتجوزت من أي واحدة من أميركا أو ألمانيا مثلاً. الاماكن السياحية في سراييفو هناك العديد من الاماكن السياحية في سراييفو المميزة في سراييفو ولذلك سنقدم لكم في هذا الموضوع نبذة مختصرة عن الاماكن السياحية في سراييفو والانشطة التي يمكنك القيام بها اثناء تواجدكم في سراييفو.

Sarah Ahmed

I want to think of that struggle to expose violence as snap, what I call simply feminist snap. We hear each other in the wear and the tear of the words we share; we hear what it is like to come up against the same thing over and over again.

And the harder it is to get through the more conscious you have to become about how you will be received. Feminist snap can also be thought of as an alternative communication system. So she used the word diversity because it was a happier, lighter and more positive word.

Sarah Ahmed - Other times you have a sense of coming up against the same thing; the time of repetition, round and round. Details are In the meantime, I am sharing a few words drawn from my introduction and conclusion about the question that is the title of my book.

I have been away from my blog for such a long time! On the Uses of Use, which I sent back to my publishers at the end of August. I have been working on the uses of use since 2013. The project has been with me through thick and thin. I put my use folder away whilst I working on Living a Feminist Life and engaged in the institutional battles that so informed the tone and timbre of that text. I picked up my use project again in 2016, and it did feel like I was picking up some rather shattered pieces. I have picked up so much by following use around. All being well, the book should be out in late 2019, with Duke University Press, my publisher-companion. Together we are creating a killjoy library! Since then I have been transcribing interviews for my complaint research. I have been listening and learning. That is my task. I feel a tremendous sense of responsibility as a care-taker for the stories I have collected. I had been expecting to be sharing new posts on complaint by now but I realised I needed more time to process all I am hearing. I need to sit with and to be with the stories. So I am giving myself more time. I hope to post new work on complaint on this blog in December of this year. My first post will be on warnings. This term I will be giving two lectures on Queer Use and three lectures from my research into complaint. Details are In the meantime, I am sharing a few words drawn from my introduction and conclusion about the question that is the title of my book. The title of this book is a use expression, one that seems to point to the pointlessness of doing something. This expression often has an intonation of exasperation. I imagine hands flung in the air expressing the withdrawal of a commitment to some difficult task. I hear a drawn out sigh; the sound of giving up on something that had previously been pursued. It seems appropriate to ask about use, what it means to use something or to find a use for something, with such a moment of exasperation; a moment when we lose it, rather than use it. Peggy is having what we might call a feminist killjoy moment; she is interrupting a family gathering with this question, posed sharply, pointedly. Peggy does not obey her command. She is listening to scraps of conversation, to laughter bubbling away at the surface. Perhaps she can hear what is being said because she does find happiness convincing. A feeling of animosity possessed her. He was still smiling but his smile smoothed itself out as she looked at him. The question of use becomes a personal question; a question about how a person lives their life. Her utterance is too sharp; she regrets it. It is a question posed by sisters, such as Peggy, who are interrupting the flow of a conversation about the lives of men. The wife becomes the one who ceases; for whom the questioning of use is a questioning of being. Perhaps to be defined in relation to men, as sisters, as wives, is to be deemed useful to them, but not to others. When you question the point of something the point seems to be how quickly you can be removed from the conversation. Maybe, she removes herself. It is question Woolf poses to herself, a question she poses about her own writing. It implies that that some things we do, things we are used to or are told to get used to, are in the way of a feminist project of living differently. The woman writer is trying to craft an existence, to write, to make something, in a world in which she is usually cast as sister or wife. It is not surprising that when the world is not used to you, when you appear as unusual, use becomes what you question. But in challenging how the requirement to be useful can be imposed upon us, we open up a conversation about usefulness and how it might matter. I think again of Audre Lorde who especially in her later work spoke often of her desire to be useful to others. She speaks too of her desire for her own death to be a useful death 1988, 53. Not falling into death, not going the same way others are going, as things have gone before, requires asking questions. Usefulness here is about asking questions about how to do something; how to be something. She notes that you have no choice; mortality is the condition of having to die. Making that death useful would be winning for me. Audre Lorde teaches us that we need to keep the question of use alive not because use does not matter but because it does. I noted in my introduction how this question can sound like exasperation, giving up on the point of something. To make use a question is to inherit a feminist and queer project of living differently. Asking the point of use might be an address to. To be useful can be a way of addressing a world; a multiple plural to, to that faces many directions; to that can animate a life, too. Animation: queer use as the work you have to do to be. The more you are blocked the more you have to try to find a way through. The less support you have the more support you need. Perhaps the harder it is to be, the more use you have for use. References Bell, Quentin 1972. Virginia Woolf: A Biography. A Burst of Light, Essays. Ithaca, New York: Firebrand Books. I am sharing the last lecture I presented this academic year. I gave the lecture as part of the third symposium curated by Nikita Dhawan for Akademie der Künste, June 23-24, 2018. You can listen to the presentations. I have resisted the temptation to add to the lecture — I am sharing what I presented. Whilst in Berlin I also read from Living a Feminist Life for a stand-alone event organised by Iris Rajanayagam for. I want to thank all of those attended and especially those who shared some of their own experiences during the discussion. I wish all you killjoys out there the hottest of feminist summers! Refusal, Resignation and Complaint, Lecture presented by Sara Ahmed at Colonial Repercussions conference, Berlin, June 23 2018. On March 10 2014 a panel took place at University College, London with Black British scholars William Ackah, Nathaniel Adam Tobias Coleman, Deborah Gabriel, Lisa Amanda Palmer, Nathan Richards and Shirley Tate 1. Galton as you probably know coined the word eugenics described by him as a science of improvement. Galton bequeathed funds to UCL then London University for a Professorship as well as Department of Eugenics. This questioning of a legacy was represented to the wider public as the. Whilst we might support such a campaign if it did indeed exist there was no such campaign; it was in fact invented to discredit the questioning of a legacy as censorship and vandalism. To discredit the questioning of a legacy is to discredit the questioner. If questioning what is received as inheritance is understood as damaging institutions, we need to damage institutions. So much of the work we do is dealing with the consequences of the work we do. We might think of no as expressive. The word express comes from press. It implies something that is squeezed out. To get a no out you have to do more than say no; a no needs somewhere to go. My talk will be concerned with we can call diversity work, the ordinary and painstaking work of working on institutions so they are more accommodating. I will be talking today specifically about working on universities: although I am no longer at a university I am still working on it. It might seem like an odd choice for an event on utopianism, desire and hope, to be talking about doing this kind of institutional work; the kind that often does not seem to get us very far. But for me it is from our small efforts to make room that we register the full force of what we are up against. Maybe what I will be offering today is a killjoy utopianism, a willingness to inhabit what seems negative as an insistence that worlds can be otherwise. We are willing to be there, in the wear and tear, for as long as it takes. In the book, I follow use around, the way I followed happiness in The Promise of Happiness, and will in Willful Subjects. And I have followed use right back into the university, as a way of thinking about how universities are built. I will also be drawing on data I collected in project on diversity, first presented in my book, On Being Included as well as new material from my current research on complaint in which I have been talking to students, academics and administrators about their experience of making complaints within universities. Uses of Use To transform institutions requires becoming conscious of how they are built. We can think of this consciousness as consciousness of use. So I am start with use. Use when used as a verb can mean: to employ for some purpose, to expend or consume; to treat or behave toward; to take unfair advantage of or exploit; to habituate or accustom. What they are for brings them into existence. Even if something is shaped around what it is for, that is not the end of the story. As Howard Risatti notes in A Theory of Craft : Use need not correspond to intended function. Most if not all objects can have a use, or, more accurately be made useable by being put to use. A sledgehammer can pound or it can be used as a paperweight or lever. A handsaw can cut a board and be used as straight-edge or to make music. A chair can be sat in and used to prop open a door. Use can correspond to intended function, but use does not necessarily correspond to an intended function. This not is an opening. I am not so sure if uses are quite as unrevealing about things as Risatti implies at least here. I am being told something about the qualities of a sledgehammer that it can be used as a paperweight. That a sledgehammer can be used as a paperweight tells me about the heaviness of the sledgehammer. Something cannot be used for anything. Use is a restriction of possibility that is material. Nevertheless there is something queer about use; intentions do not exhaust possibilities. Risatti implies that use makes something usable. Use also makes something used. Wear and tear usually means a depreciation of value. I think of the surface of a table, worn, scratched. We can think of the marks left by use not as the erosion of value but as testimony. The table testifies to a history. Machinery intensifies rather than saves labour: you have to get the most of the machine before it wears out, a wearing that is passed on to workers, wearing out as passing on and passing out; used as used up. A worn thing might eventually break. When something breaks from use it might be taken out of use, rather like this cup, which has lost its handle. It is a rather sad parting. When we think of something in use, we might think of a sign on a door: occupied. This sign tells us that the toilet is in use. It tells us that we cannot use the toilet until whoever is using the toilet is finished using the toilet. Use often comes with instructions that are about maintaining personal and social boundaries. Or take this image of a post box. There is a sign that politely asks the would-be poster not to use the post box by posting a letter into the box. In the previous image the toilet was occupied because it was in use. In this case the post box is out of use because it is occupied. Although of course from another point of view, it is in use. The post box has provided a home for nesting birds. Intended functionality can mean who something is for, not just what something is for. Which means that: something can be used by those for whom it was not intended. The sign, we assume, is temporary. That box will come back into use as a post box when it ceases to be a nest. Back into use: use can involve comings and goings. Take the example of the well-trodden path. The path exists in part because people have used it. Use involves contact and friction, the tread of feet smooths the surface; the path is becoming smoother, easier to follow. The more a path is used the more a path is used. How strange this sentence makes sense. Without use a path might disappear, becoming overgrown, bumpy; unusable. Like this path; we know it is a path because of a sign. But you can hardly see the sign for the leaves. A path can appear as a line on a landscape. A path can also be a route through life. Heterosexuality can be a path; an easing of a passage, a clearing of a way forward. To deviate from that path can be hard. When it is harder to proceed, when a path is harder to follow, you might be discouraged; you might try and find another route. Think of how you can be dissuaded by perpetual reminders of how hard something would be. Deviation is made hard. So much is reproduced by the requirement to follow. In the academy you might be asked to follow the well-trodden paths of citation; to cite properly as to cite those deemed to have already the most influence. The more a path is used the more a path is used. The more he is cited the more he is cited. A path is kept clear through work; occupation depends upon erasure; such and such white man might become an originator of a concept, an idea as becoming seminal, by removing traces of those who were here before. When use leaves traces in places, occupation can involve the removal of those traces 2. On Being Stopped Diversity work is the work of trying to transform institutions by opening them up to populations that have hitherto been excluded; diversity work as deviating from the well-used paths, as not going the way things are flowing. And yet at another level diversity seems to be a rather well-used path, an arrow even, which can be an instruction and thus a direction: Go that way! The ease with which diversity travels might be why diversity work is hard work. Diversity can be a sign of the difficulty of getting through. If you keep banging your head against the brick wall, but the wall keeps its place, it is you that gets sore. What happens to the wall? All you seemed to have done is scratched the surface. This is what diversity work often feels like: Scratching the surface, scratching at the surface. Let me share with you an example of an encounter with an institutional wall. The example is from a practitioner who developed a new policy on appointments. This is the story: When I was first here there was a policy that you had to have three people on every panel who had been diversity trained. But then there was a decision early on when I was here, that it should be everybody, all panel members, at least internal people. They took that decision at the equality and diversity committee which several members of SMT were present at. And so they had to take it through and reverse it. And the Council decision was that all people should be trained. And despite that I have then sat in meetings where they have just continued saying that it has to be just 3 people on the panel. And I said but no Council changed their view and I can give you the minutes and they just look at me as if I am saying something really stupid, this went on for ages, even though the Council minutes definitely said all panel members should be trained. And to be honest sometimes you just give up. A decision has been made. That decision can be overridden by the momentum of the past: the past becomes a well-worn path, what usually happens still happens. Note that the head of human resources did not need to take the policy out of the minutes for the policy not to come into effect. The wall: that which keeps standing. The wall is a finding. Let me summarise the finding: what stops movement moves. If we witness the movement we might miss the mechanism. I think this is important as organisations are good at moving things around: creating evidence of doing something is not the same thing as doing something. It was the way in which those within the institution acted after the policy had been agreed. Agreeing to something can be another way of stopping something from happening. A diversity policy can come into existence without coming into use. I noted earlier how a sign is often used to make a transition from something being in and out of use, such as in this case of the post-box. Institutions are also postal systems. Maybe the diversity worker deposits the policy in the post-box because she assumes the box is in use. The post-box that is not in use might have another function: it might stop the policy from going through the whole system. A policy can become unusable by not being used. Consider too all the energy this practitioner expended on developing a policy that did not do anything. Or maybe she flies off the handle, to recall that broken cup. The expression flying off the handle can mean to snap or lose your temper. The feminist killjoy, that leaky container, comes up here; she comes up in what we hear. We hear each other in the wear and the tear of the words we share; we hear what it is like to come up against the same thing over and over again. We imagine the eyes rolling as if to say: well she would say that. A wall can be what you encounter because of what you are trying to do. Making a complaint can also involve coming up against walls. If a policy appears to create a path, a path can be how you are stopped from getting though. Complaints procedures are often pictured as paths, as flow-charts; flow, flow, away we go, arrows, which give the would-be complainant a route through. I spoke to an administrator about her work in supporting students through the complaints process: So your first stage would require the complainant to try and resolve it informally, which is really difficult in some situations and which is where it might get stuck in a department…And so it takes a really tenacious complaining student to say, no, I am being blocked. A complaint is not simply an outcome of a no, a complaint requires you to keep saying no along the way. And what is required to keep a complaint going — such as confidence and tenacity — might be what is negated by the very experiences that led you to complain. Complaints can be stopped by the use of warnings. A warning can function like a singular exclamation point; we know what they are telling us to do from how they are used: Stop! Remember: deviation is hard. Deviation is made hard. Complaints can be stopped by the appearance of being heard. An academic describes what followed when students made a complaint about the behaviour of professors at research events. Perhaps an organisation can allow a no to be expressed when that no has nowhere to go. Venting is used as technique of preventing something more explosive from happening: you let a complaint be expressed in order that it can be contained. Once the students have vented their frustrations, getting the complaint out of their system, the complaint is out of the system. This mechanism functions like a pressure relief valve that releases enough pressure so that it does not build up and cause an explosion. If you do keep going with a complaint where do they end up? Thus I have received numerous accounts of complaints that are lodged and still nothing happens. Perhaps complaints sit there, rather like that diversity policy. The post-box becomes a filing cabinet; a complaint is filed away. Files can also function as bins; how things are discarded. When a complaint is filed away or binned those who complain can end up feeling that they too are filed away or binned. Closing the Door Sometimes a complaint is registered because of who you are not. A not can also be about where you have to go. You might end up on a diversity committee because of whom you are not: not men, not white, not cis, not straight, not able-bodied. The more nots you are the more committees you end up on! Even you agree to be on the committee they can still find you disagreeable. And as soon as I started mentioning things to do with race they changed the portfolio of who could be on the committee and I was dropped. The word race might be used less because it does more. The word race carries a complaint; race as a refusal of the smile of diversity. Any use of the word race is thus an overuse. Perhaps a not is heard as shouting, as insistence, a stress point, a sore point. A complaint can be how you are received. A complaint can be what you have to make because of how a university is occupied. Aired: even the air can be occupied. She gathered statements from around twenty people in her department. A complaint can be a feminist collective. A complaint can be evidence of a no that is shared. A meeting is set up in response to her complaint. Her complaint goes nowhere. When those who try to stop a culture from being reproduced are stopped, a culture is being reproduced. She describes the department as a revolving door: women and minorities arrive only to head right back out again; whoosh, whoosh. You might have to get out because of what you find out when you get in. Doors are not only physical things that swing on hinges though they are that they are mechanisms that enable an opening or closing. Diversity is often represented as an open door; minorities welcome, come in, come in; diversity as a tag-line, tag along; tagged on. Come in, come in: I think back to our post-box. I suggested earlier that use is a restriction of possibility that is material. You can use paper for some things and not others because of the material qualities of paper. Restrictions can also become material through use. The letters in the box, the words that are thrown out; they become materials, they pile up; they stop others from making use of something. What is material to some, leaving you with no room, no room to breathe, to nest, to be, can be what does not matter to others because it does not get in the way of their occupation of space; it might even enable their occupation. You can stop others from using a space by how a space is being used, by what a space is being used for; for as door. A door can be what stops you from getting in. A door can also be what stops you from getting out. I am speaking to an academic about the first complaint she made when she was a student. One of her lecturers on her course had been making her feel uncomfortable. She did get out of his room, but it was hard. Behind closed doors; harassment happens there, out of view, in secret. A door is shut on her. The same door is shut on a complaint. She submitted an informal complaint, a letter, detailing the assault. Where does her complaint go? Her letter ends up with the Dean. And what did he do? To formalize a complaint would become a failure, her failure, to resolve the situation more amicably. Would become, would have become: she did not proceed to a formal complaint. Her complaint was stopped; he was not. I say her complaint was stopped rather than she was stopped because she did go on to have a career, she is now a professor. But her experience stayed with her. Her complaint was stopped, she was not, but she carries that history with her. What happened to him? I had a friend who was very vulnerable, he took advantage of that, she ended up taking her own life. He went on; he was allowed to go on, when her complaint, and for all we know there were others too, we do not know how many said no, did not stop him. He has since retired; much respected by his peers; no blemish on his record. The damage carried by those who did complain or would complain if they could complain, carried around like baggage, slow, heavy, down. To hear complaint is to hear from those weighed down by a history that has not left a trace in the official records. No blemish on his record, no trace in the official records: the organisation shares an interest in stopping what is recorded by a complaint from getting out. Shares an interest: a complaint can be stopped because of what is shared. Importance is not just a judgment it is a direction. The more a path is used the more a path is used. The more he is connected the more he is connected. The more he is connected the more others are invested in that connection. A professor becomes a conductor; information, energy, resources travel through him. I think of this becoming as institutional funneling; paths become narrower and narrower at the exit points; you have to go through him to get anywhere. Uses of use, a restriction of possibility that has become material, uses of use, a narrowing of the routes, the more a path is used the less paths there are to use: more going through less. The student did go ahead with a complaint. So much of our political work is the work we do to ensure that making a complaint does not mean closing a door. Conclusion: A Leak is a Lead We are willing to be there, in the wear and tear, for as long as it takes. You have to work to keep going, to keep a complaint going. In giving my ear to complaint, I am learning and listening with hope, to hope. By this I do not mean I feel hopeful or those I have spoken to feel hopeful though we might do; we can do. To persist with a complaint requires a refusal of institutional fatalism, that sense that is just how things are; that abuses of power even when fatal, are inevitable, same old, same old, same old bodies, doing the same old things. You persist because you sense what is possible; that spaces can be freed up when they are inhabited differently. Perhaps this image can be a pointer. This image teaches us what is possible 3. The birds could have been treated as trespassers, ejected or displaced. A history of use is a history of such displacements, many violent, displacements that often disappear because of how things remain occupied. To make room for others so often requires work, hard work, pain-staking work, collective work. To fight for room is to fight for a possibility that has been restricted by use. A complaint: when you have to fight for a possibility. My project on complaint was inspired by my own experiences of working on multiple enquiries into sexual harassment and sexual misconduct, which is to say my project was inspired by students: this work is for you. After three years I eventually. I know it has taken me a long time in this talk for me to talk about resignation, although not as long as it took me to resign. And it is still difficult for me to talk about my resignation in public, so please bear with me, the details will be absent, but at least I am present. I resigned because I had had enough, and because I did not want to stay silent about what had been going on. Resignation is another way of saying no to system; you withdraw your labour, your body, yourself. The word resignation can seem to suggest giving up, reconciling yourself to your fate, to resign yourself to something. I hear the word resignation and I hear a long drawn out sigh. But can be how you refuse to resign yourself to a situation. Perhaps you are giving up on something, a belief that you can do the work here, but you are holding onto something, a belief in that work. What appears to be giving up can be a refusal to give in. I resigned in part because of the silence about what was going on. To get information out sometimes you need to get out. There is no point in being silent about resigning if you are resigning to protest silence. When I shared my reasons for resigning I became the cause of damage. I became a leaky pipe: drip, drip. Just loosen the screw a little bit, a tiny, tiny little bit, and more and more will come out. It can be explosive what comes out. We need more explosions. Organisations will try and contain that damage. The response in other words is damage limitation. This is how diversity often takes institutional form: damage limitation. Happy shiny policies will be put in place, holes left by departures will be filled without reference to what went on before; a blot becomes something to be wiped up: mopping up a mess. But there is hope here: they cannot mop up all of the mess. A leak can be a lead. A leak can be a feminist lead. It might seem that complaints that do not get anywhere disappear without a trace like that unused path: Hard to find, harder to follow. But in saying no, we keep a history alive; we do not let go. Even complaints that do not seem to get anywhere lead us to each other. Feminist memory can become a counter-institutional project; we have to find ways of creating paths for others to follow, to leave traces in places. We refuse to let a refusal disappear. You hold on by passing a refusal on. An indigenous student made an informal complaint about white supremacy in her classroom: using that kind of term for what is here can get you in serious trouble; she knew that but she was willing to do that. The complaints in the graveyard can come back to haunt institutions. It is a promise. When you are stopped you have to find other methods of getting information out. It is not just that we have exhausted the usual procedures or that we are exhausted by them; though many of us have and are. Of course we have limited options, and we use the tools available to us. Sometimes we do what is required: we might even be willing to be diversity, to smile, to help with the creation of a shinier reflection. But we have to be careful not to lose ourselves in that reflection. We do not want to polish away the scratches; they are testimony. Yes those scratches; we are back to those scratches. We can reach each other through what appears as damage, mere scratch and scribble. Feminism becomes writing on the wall; we were here, we did not get used it. This post is dedicated to my wonderful colleague and friend Rumana Begum. Thank you for helping me to keep going. These are the conversations we need to be having and these are the voices we need to hear. Queer use can refer to how we can use things in ways that were not intended or how things can be used by those for whom they were not intended. I suggest that it is not enough simply to affirm the queerness of use: to queer use is to have a fight on your hands precisely because of how restrictions have become material. In 2010 I also explore polishing in relation to the work of creating the appearance of happy families. By polishing I am referring to the activity of marketing alongside other forms of labour within organisations that is often performed by academic themselves. Sister Outsider: Essays and Speeches, Trumansburg: The Crossing Press. A Theory of Craft: Function and Aesthetic Expression. University of North Carolina Press. Two years ago today I shared my reasons for from my post. I resigned in protest at the failure of my college to address sexual harassment as an institutional problem. I resigned because the costs of doing that work were too high. And I have been thinking as I have been listening to those who have been involved in the time-consuming, life-consuming, process of making complaints about time; about the time of complaint. It takes so much time to get a complaint through the system, which is why so many complaints end up being about the system. It has been two years since I made the reasons for my resignation public. And I still have a sense of rage and injustice, also tiredness and sadness, from doing that work with others and from knowing what was left undismantled despite that work. But I still have those letters handy: it is almost as if they are there waiting in the background, ready to come out. I just have to read something, notice something, perhaps a passing reference to what happened, or yet another appropriation of the work we did, and those letters start writing themselves again. And: you can find it upsetting that you still find it upsetting. If the work of complaint takes time, it takes time to recover from the work of complaint. It is not over. It is not over because what you complained about is not over. If you complain about harassment you are harassed. Harassment is a means by which a complaint about harassment is stopped. Those who are not stopped from complaining are often harassed all the more. It is thus hard to untangle the slow time of complaint from the slow time of harassment. So many of the accusations that have been hurled against me in public as well as in private have been hurled against many other feminists. We can share accusations: you are a bully, the real harasser, a feminazi; you are punishing and puritanical. You are accused of wanting their jobs for yourself. You are called neoliberal feminists if you use internal disciplinary procedures, as colluding with management; you are accused of conducting a vigilante campaign or a witch hunt when you have exhausted those internal procedures. If you try to stop harassment you come up against what enables that harassment. The accusations that are thrown out; they might seem pointless and careless but they are pointed and careful. They are part of a system; a system works by making it costly to expose how a system works. I think it is important for us to share this: that the harassment does not end just because a complaint has ended, however a complaint has ended. I still receive hate mail because of my involvement in a complaint about sexual harassment and sexual misconduct. You can refuse to open letters, you can discard comments posted to your blog, you can ignore messages received, but that work of refusal is still work. You can even be affected by the work you do in trying not to be affected. It has taken me a long time to be less affected by doing this work. Even if you understand and can explain where these communications come from, they can be wearing. You can feel worn. When I left my post I did experience a loss of confidence, a sense of no longer being sure of myself or others. If confidence can be taken in time, restoring confidence takes time. The time it takes to recover from a complaint; the time it takes to make a complaint; so much time taken. But remember the time of not complaining about harassment is the slow time of harassment; the time it takes to complain is time worth taking. About time: so many of my interviews with those who have made complaints have been about time. I have learnt that the time taken to make a complaint can be used to disqualify a complaint. One member of staff made a complaint about bullying from her head of department. The experience of bullying had been devastating, and she suffered from depression as a result. It took her a long time to get to the point where she could write a complaint. And I put in the complaint and the response that I got was from the deputy VC. And we know this: some experiences are so devastating that it takes a long time to process them. Which might mean that: the more devastated you are the less likely you are to get through. The experiences that lead you to make a complaint can stop a complaint from being recognised as a complaint. Time can be used as a tool: if organizations can disqualify complaints because they take too long to make, organizations can also take too long to respond to complaints. Exhaustion as a management technique: you tire people out so they are too tired to address what makes them too tired. When the organisation takes a long time, you are left waiting. One member of staff who complained about bullying used this analogy: waiting for the next response to her complaint was like waiting for a bill to come through the door. You do not know whether the next bill will be the one that breaks you. The longer it takes to receive a response, the longer you are on high alert; anxiety about what might happen can be enough to make a complaint impossible to sustain. I spoke to two students who made a complaint about sexual harassment. The slow time of waiting; the fast time of deadlines: too slow, too fast. Other times you have a sense of coming up against the same thing; the time of repetition, round and round. Sometimes also: up and down. At times you might feel like you are getting somewhere, you might feel encouraged, but then, something happens or nothing happens; nothing is something. Round and round, up and down. I think back to the time it took for me to realise that I had to leave. I have called that realization : the moment you realise what you cannot do, that something has broken, a bond to an institution, or a belief that you can make an institution more accommodating. If snap can be experienced as a moment, the moment you do not take it anymore, that moment has a history. It was quite a long time after the enquiries took place that I realised I had to leave. What I found most difficult was the silence, the very loud silence that felt rather like calm waters over a sunken ship. As the ripples lessened, as if nothing had happened, as if the enquiries had not even taken place, as if not talking about it meant it was gone, I knew my days were numbered. You can realise you have to leave. But it can still take time to leave. I first asked for unpaid leave. I know the form goes nowhere but in a file but it strikes me that everywhere we are asked not to name the problem, so at least on my own form I can name the problem. And it is true: it is the reason. What happens: it is not that nothing happens. But the form is. My leave is agreed but there is no mention of the reasons. No mention of the reasons for leave are the reasons for leaving. Leaving: maybe that too was something that took time before it could took place, something that happened, gradually, slowly. We can exit a situation as we begin to realise that our efforts to transform a situation are not getting anywhere. The time it takes to make a complaint; the time it takes to leave. I think back now to those three years, draining, how they were draining. I think of myself as breaking a little each day, each day in my own way. Mostly when you are involved in a complaint you are still doing your other work, as a student, as a teacher, an administrator. You are doing the work of complaint alongside doing your work. One time just after I testified in one of the enquiries I had to go and give a lecture on the idea of race. It is always emotional to give this lecture; an idea is not abstraction; you can embody an idea. This time I am shaking. Words: they can spill out, shattering. Another time just before I testified at another enquiry, I saw someone who I had heard stuff about; I knew his role in what happened. I feel physically sick. Another time I see him at an event. A colleague told me I turned white. It takes a lot to turn a brown girl white. In my last proper day at work we had a departmental meeting. A caring and well-meaning colleague got my resignation on the agenda — he got sexual harassment on the agenda. It is mentioned along with another item. The other item is picked up. I hear it being passed over. I hear sexual harassment being passed over. I rush out the room and I am sick in the toilets. I now think of that vomiting as a feminist act: all that came up, all that I refused to digest. Guts can be feminist friends. I can tell you this now, with confidence: I did not cope. I could not cope. I would not cope. They will you give you words to explain the act of not coping. But you hear what that diagnosis might be doing in an institutional setting. It can be used to imply a complaint is like an infection, spreading from body to body, organically: how she infects herself, how she infects others; complaining as not only not coping, but as being too easily affected by others. A complaint becoming a complaint in another sense: as a bodily condition, an ailment, an illness. You can sense the utility of such a frame: it allows the institution to disappear. Making complaints requires we give other explanations for why we make complaints. What I found difficult to cope with was not what I learnt from students, however hard it was to hear what happened to many of the students I spoke to, but what I learnt about the institution from its response to the harassment. What was hard was the complicity, the silence. To be silent was to be part of the institutional silence. Why should we cope with this? Why would we cope with this? We are supposed to cope; to hold ourselves together. What if holding ourselves together is how the information is held? What if coping is containing? What if the very techniques for coping with violence are the same techniques for reducing the significance of violence? A complaint: when we let out, spill out, what we are supposed to contain. A complaint: when we transform what we do not cope with into a protest at what we are supposed to cope with. Not coping: it can feel like a failure; you can feel like a failure. It can feel like you have lost the handle. Maybe we need to fly off the handle. And maybe not coping is an action. And maybe not coping is how we create a collective. That collective might be fragile but it is also feminist and furious. We carry what matters with us. I am sharing the introduction I gave for a panel discussion Confrontation? Doing Feminist and Anti-Racist Work in Institutions. I learnt so much from the panel and from the combined reflections offered by Leila Whitley, Tiffany Page, Heidi Mirza, Lola Olufemi and Monica Moreno Figueroa. Together they asked us to think about who does the work of confronting institutions and who does not and also to consider how those who end up having to confront institutions are often those who have already been made precarious by institutions. We talked about the exhaustion of doing this kind of work, and how making lasting political change might involve small steps taken over a long time. We reflected too on the importance of not allowing institutions to swallow us up and of developing our own survival strategies, which might include taking breaks or holding on to our friendships and relationships that matter to us and that exist outside of the institutions in which we work. We reflected on how confrontation can sometimes operate as a masculinist style of doing institutional or political work; and how there are different ways of doing that work not all of which will be recognised as confrontational. I want to thank Leila, Tiffany, Heidi, Lola and Monica: they reminded me that however hard it is to try to transform institutions we find each other by doing the work. I am pleased to introduce and chair our panel on Confrontation? Doing Feminist and Anti-Racist Work in Institutions. To start off I want to say something about why we have made confrontation our leading question in opening up a discussion about doing institutional work. Being in an institution can be hard work especially when institutions are not built for us. It might be the work you have to do to get here or to enter a room because you do not have the right background or the right body. It might be the work you have to do to stay in the room because of what you find when you arrive. So much feminist and anti-racist work is the work of trying to transform institutions so they are more accommodating. That work includes the work we have to do to show what we already know; how difficult and hostile institutions are or can be; how white, how male-dominated; how racist, how sexist and so on. Institutions do not always reveal themselves. I began to hear how whiteness was justified. I already knew the university was white; I was I had got used to that whiteness even though it was wearing. But I began to hear how senior managers defended the whiteness of the university. These conversations, or perhaps we should call them defences, were happening because the Race Relations Amendment Act was about to come into force. The university was going to have to deal with the question of race: a conversation can be compliance. In one meeting a senior manager said we could not do anything about whiteness as whiteness is just about geography. In another meeting a Dean said race was too difficult to deal with. I was the only person of colour at that meeting and a newbie killjoy: I did not quite have the confidence at the time to confront him. But I sent him an email saying no, you are reproducing the problem by making it something that is too difficult to deal with. A can become a career trajectory. I ended up on the newly formed race equality committee and from that point on I was always on such committees; diversity committees became my institutional house, where I ended up hanging out. We often up on such committees because of who are not: not men, not white, not straight, not able-bodied, not cis. The more nots you are the more committees you end up on! And yet it is wearing: the work you have to do in order to be accommodated can make it even harder to be accommodated. It is interesting to me now that it was trying to confront whiteness that led me on that path. Yes the diversity path might be difficult and it can slow your progression, and it can be how others are freed from that requirement to do the institutional work. But it also an interesting path: you find out a lot about institutions when you follow this route. The conversations we had as a group of academics and administrators have stayed with me; conversations about what words to use, what words not to use in writing a race equality policy. We learn from where our words end up. We learn too from where documents end up. Our race equality document ended up being ranked by the ECU Equality Challenge Unit as excellent along with many other documents I would add. And the university was able to use the policy as evidence that it was good at race equality. I will always remember the experience of being at a university meeting — we had a new vice chancellor and he was enthusiastic about equality as new vice chancellors tend to be. He waved the letter and said well done, we are good at equality. Policies can be useful because they create an impression of doing something without necessarily doing anything. It was a disheartening process but I learnt from it: when you confront the institution with what it has failed to do, you can still end up being used as evidence of what has been done. Of course people of colour are often used as evidence; we appear in their brochures so they can appear diverse. And we are supposed to smile. Just by not smiling we are perceived as being too confrontational. Or to use certain words, words such as racism, whiteness, white supremacy, can mean being heard as confrontational and as intent on causing damage. Confrontation can then be how you are received; you can be heard as confrontational, whatever you do or say, because of what you bring up by turning up. You have to try hard not to appear confrontational when that is how you already appear: diversity work can be the work you have to do to counter how you appear. My own experience of doing diversity led me to a research project in which I talked to diversity practitioners about their work. So she used the word diversity because it was a happier, lighter and more positive word. She sensed she could travel further by indicating in advance what she was not willing to confront. I learnt so much from listening to practitioners about strategy, about how we do the work we do. And there is a lot of work to do. But given what we come up against, the work also requires creativity and persistence. I think it is important we value the work for what it teaches us. So I am going to introduce you to the panel by naming just some of the institutional work each member of the panel has been doing. The remaining panellists were all members of the Centre for Feminist Research at Goldsmiths. The CFR is somewhat of a shared thread and I want to say a little about the work we did because if we pull that thread we end up here. The CFR was set up in 2013, which happened to be the same year I was asked to attend a meeting with students about sexual harassment and sexual misconduct. The CFR became a kind of feminist shelter, a place to go to recover from the fight we had on our hands, which was a fight, even, to recognise that there was a problem, and that it was an institutional problem; to have a conversation about the problem. A feminist shelter: so much of our work is the work of supporting each other given what we are trying to confront. Looking back on this incredibly intense period I realise again the significance of what might seem obvious: the harder it is to get through the more you have to do. And the harder it is to get through the more conscious you have to become about how you will be received. I will give just one example. We drafted a letter to the Warden, which was a call for action, which was eventually sent on September 30 2015. I was looking at the first drafts of the letter. What is interesting if unsurprising was how the more confrontational language was gradually edited out. We all probably have experience of doing the work of editing out our more confrontational language. We do this work of editing out the more confrontational language because we sense the less confrontational we are the further we will get. If we edit words out of letters, what else do we edit out? Can what be who: who gets edited out in that process? Does it work: do you go further by being less confrontational? Can you use their terms to acquire the resources and then use the resources to confront the institution in your own terms? Or if you receive resources from the institution does it become more difficult to confront the institution because you have something to lose? These are life questions, institutional questions; these are our questions. Sometimes doing the work of confrontation is too much to sustain, in other words, the work can get in the way of living a feminist life. Another way of trying to confront an institution is to leave it. I needed to give out a signal. There is not much point in being silent about why you are protesting when you are protesting silence. When I shared my reasons for from my post — in protest at the failure of the institution to address sexual harassment as an institutional problem — I quickly became the cause of damage. I became a leaky pipe, drip, drip. Organisations will try and contain that damage. The response in other words is damage limitation. This is how diversity often takes institutional form: damage limitation. Happy shiny policies will be put in place; holes left by departures filled without reference to what went on before. Indeed there is often a blur of activity after an exposure of a problem. Even new complaint procedures, however important, can be used in this way: as evidence of what is being done; as a distraction from what is not being done. But there is hope here: they cannot mop up all the mess. When you lift the lid, more and more come out. It can be explosive, what comes out. Of course this is why professional norms of conduct are about keeping a lid on it; silence as institutional loyalty, silence in case of institutional damage. If it would be, it should be. No wonder it is hard to release that data. To release that data often requires using alternative methods, because following the usual procedures is often how we are stopped from getting information out. And so we might: write names of harassers in books; distribute leaflets; gather in protest to reclaim spaces that have become unavailable because of how they are used. We often end up doing this kind of work because we have exhausted the usual procedures. To use alternative methods has costs: those who use such methods are often disciplined for not working in the right way. I have examined public statements and confidential letters that assume this disciplinary form: where not following the usual procedures has been identified as damaging organisations and even in some cases as damaging feminism. If there is a fall-out, it is because stuff needs to come out. I want to learn from the fact that it is even possible that some feminists would recommend not speaking out about the role of the institution in enabling and participating in harassment. Personally: I would think of this work as part of our job description. It might be that for some feminists to become part of an institution requires loyalty, expressed as the need to protect the organisation from anything that could damage its reputation. Or a concern might be that if feminist projects are resourced by an institution to speak out about the institutional violence would be to compromise those resources. So a feminist project ends up being defending the organisation from being compromised. Or a concern might be that if the information gets out, it will become inflated possibly by being taken up by third parties in a sensationalist way, thus allowing others to overlook the feminist work being done within that institution. I do want to understand the concerns. But I still think we have a problem. We have a problem when silence about violence becomes a way of holding onto feminism. And problems can be pedagogy: by not confronting a problem a problem is reproduced. Too often working in house ends up being a restoration project, polishing the furniture so it appears less damaged. Sometimes we do what is required: we might even be willing to reflect the good image the institution has of itself back to itself, talking about the institution as being critical and progressive for instance. But you have to be careful not to lose yourself in the reflection. We have to be careful not to lose ourselves in the reflection. Today we want to talk as openly as we can about doing the work, feminist and anti-racist work, the work of exposing the problem, of becoming the problem, about what it feels like; the risks and the compromises; to talk about what we might find and what we might lose along the way and what can be who, who we might find, who we might lose. If one way of stopping confrontation is to increase the costs of confrontation, then to do the work, the work that can be characterised as confrontational because of what it refuses not to reveal, requires finding ways to share these costs. It came out of our experiences of fighting for feminism. The network is open to anyone who in fighting for feminism has to fight against institutions; anyone who has had to confront what others do not want revealed. What we fight against can be how we are for; what we are for; feminism as for. So much of the collective labour of trying to bring an end to harassment and bullying is invisible and is performed by students and early career academics. We need to recognise and value this work as well as consider its costs. References Lorde, Audre 1984. Sister Outsider: Essays and Speeches, Trumansburg: The Crossing Press. Inside the Ivory Tower: Narratives of Women of colour surviving and thriving in academia. I am sharing some words I gave recently at a vigil. There are no notes or references; these are spoken words. I will have more to share soon. Solidarity with my fellow killjoys, with those marching for a different life. As I am speaking to you in a chapel it seems right to begin with Lorde. She is often where I begin. She compares battling cancer to living with anti-black racism, a comparison that is deeply effective, teaching us how racism can be experienced as an attack on the body. Lorde refused not to fight for life. It is rebellious to fight for life when you have been given a deadly assignment. Feminism: we are fighting for our lives. And we are fighting against a system. A system can be upheld by violence. It might be the violence that follows being seen as a girl or woman, why are you not smiling love, comments thrown out as how you are thrown out; or physical or sexual violence at home or on the streets. The violence does things; you might retreat from the world, taking up less and less space, you might feel less, that you worth less. It might be the violence that follows not being legible as woman: are you a boy or a girl, the question that drips with hostility; the violence that insists you must be legible as one or the other. It might be the violence that follows not getting it right, not acting like you should, not walking right, not speaking right; not liking the right things because that is not what girl or a boy is supposed to like, or to be or to do, a violence that punishes deviation from a norm. Deviation is made hard. Violence hovers around the deviant. You stand out from what is around and about. When you are black or brown in a sea of whiteness; you become noticeable. It might be the violence of having insults thrown at you or being asked, again and again, and questions can be wearing, for some to be is to be in question: Where are you from? Where are you really from? The questions are assertions in disguise: as if to say brown, black, is not from here, not here, not. It might the violence that follows being seen as women together, lesbians, as if by not being in relation to men you are not being at all. It might be the violence of how you become understood as causing the violence directed against you as if by being who you are you have provoked that reaction. It might be the violence of how when you point out violence you are understood as causing the loss of something, harmony or peace, the way when women of colour point our racism we are heard as being divisive. It might be the violence of having to point out that rooms are inaccessible because they keep booking rooms that are inaccessible, of having to fight just to enter a room. It might be the violence of how much work you have to do to make it possible to exist, until you feel your existence is nothing but work. It might be the violence of not being able to turn to anyone to escape violence, because you are poor, or because you fear they will take away your children; or that you would be forced to leave because do not have the right papers. Intersectionality can mean this: how structures intersect; how vulnerability to violence is distributed unequally. We know so much from when we stopped, from what we are not allowed to do or be. Those who are enabled by a system often will and do deny its very existence. So much of our struggle is a struggle to expose the violence of the system. I want to think of that struggle to expose violence as snap, what I call simply feminist snap. We probably all have had experiences of snapping; snapping is an everyday experience even if we do not snap every day. Feminism too is everyday; feminism is what we are doing by living our lives in a feminist way. A snap often comes from what is wearing. Maybe you are trying to put up with it, the constant belittling of your existence, sexist jokes, racist jokes, they are not funny, so we do not laugh. We cannot always afford to express ourselves: sexism and racism can make it costly to name sexism and racism. But it is constant and you are getting tired, annoyed, frustrated, not snapping can be hard work; not challenging what undermines your existence can undermine your existence. Snapping can be what comes out when you have had enough but it can also how you are heard. In my work I have explored, reclaimed, and affirmed the figure of the feminist killjoy, the one who gets in the way of happiness or who just gets in the way. The feminist killjoy is snappy: she is heard as shouting however she speaks, because of the point she makes, the words she uses, words like sexism, words like racism, just to make these points, use these words, is to be heard as shouting, abrasive, as if by opening your mouth you are breaking something. If pointing out racism and sexism is to cause unhappiness, we are quite willing to cause unhappiness. And sometimes, we do need to break something, an idea of who we are, or who we will be, in order to make our lives possible. We might have to break a bond, it might be a family bond or a bond to a person or some we or another. A bond can be violent. What can make living with violence hard is how hard it is even to imagine or think the possibility of its overcoming; you might be isolated; you might be materially dependent; you might be down, made to think and feel you are beneath that person; you might be attached to that person, or believe that person when they say they will change; you might have become part of that person, have your life so interwoven with that person that it is hard to imagine what would be left of you if you left. She fights back; she speaks out. She has places to go because other women have been there. A bond of fate, a fatal bond. Gender can be a fatal bond. No wonder that leaving a situation of violence can feel like snap: a bond of fate has indeed been broken. She has places to go; we have places to go because others have been there. It is important when we gather together as women and non-binary people to think of the history that precedes us and that make it possible for us to be here; to keep up the fight, to reclaim the night. I think of Black feminists and feminists of colour scholar-activists working in the UK who made it possible for me to be here, Gail Lewis, Avtar Brah, Heidi Mirza, Ann Phoenix, to name a few, there are so many more because so many came before, I think of my mother Maureen, my sisters Tanya and Tamina, my auntie Gulzar Bano, a Muslim feminist who was the first woman who talked to me about feminism, she was also a poet who taught me what you could do with words; my partner Sarah and my dog Poppy. All of us: we all bring others with us. We bring our histories with us, each of us, different histories that have allowed us to be in this room, and a room can be what you inhabit but it can also be an activity; to make room with each other, for each other. There are so many who are not with us. It is right for us to mourn our losses, to count our losses, to express our grief for those who did not make it; who were taken too soon, far too soon. I think of Saba Mahmood, who died yesterday; a feminist of colour academic, a comrade. I thank you for all you gave us, all you left for us: I thank you for your words, wisdom and warmth. Feminists of colour working in the academy; we have paths to follow because of what you created. A vigil: to stay awake with a person who is dying; to mark or to mourn, to make a protest, to pray; to count our losses, to count her as loss, or, to borrow the name of a recent campaign in response to police violence against black women, can I acknowledge here the important work of Kimberle Crenshaw and Andrea Ritchie, to say her name. To say her name; to say their name. We have to fight to bring violence to attention. Feminist snap can also be thought of as an alternative communication system. Sometimes it is too risky to expose the violence of the system. It can be hard, for instance to speak out about violence that happens in Universities. I left my own post at a university because I was not willing to be silent about sexual harassment, because I did not want to reproduce what was not being addressed. When you are precarious it can be even harder to make a complaint about violence; you might not feel you have a secure enough footing. When speaking out is too risky, we have to find other ways for the violence to become manifest. We might need to use guerrilla tactics, and we have a feminist and queer history to draw upon; you can write names of harassers on books; graffiti on walls, turn bodies into art. Or to evoke a recent action by feminist direction group Sisters Uncut, we can put red ink in the water so that the centre of a city seems flooded by blood. They cut, we bleed. The riskier it is to snap, the more inventive we become. We have to occupy the building, stop the traffic; point out how business is usual is violence as usual. Snap to it: a gathering can be snap. Feminism, queer and trans histories are histories of those who have combined forces, gathered in protest, just as we are doing; we are part of that history. We keep a history alive by gathering in this way; we receive energy from others, those who came before us. I think of the Stonewall riots. An interview with Sylvia Rivera has been recently released in which she discusses what happened on that day. Say her name: Sylvia Rivera as a trans woman of colour tends not to be remembered in how those events are remembered. In her account, snap comes up. It was a day like other days for those who gathered at the bar, gays, dykes, sex workers, drag queens; a racially diverse army of the willingly perverse; an army that is used to living with police violence; an army for whom violence is usual. We had to live with it. Oh, it was so exciting. It is electric, snap, snap; sizzle, so much comes out when you tip something over. To make snap a part of how we tell the story of political movements is to show how exhaustion and rebellion can come from the same place; how those who are exhausted by the violence of a system come to revolt against that violence, how even when snap comes from sap, from being tired out, from being depleted, snap can reboot; snap can boost. Snapping, that moment when the pressure has built up and tipped over, can be the basis of a revolt, a revolt against what we are asked to put up with. We fight for what is necessary. If we started with Lorde, we can end with her too. Audre Lorde often spoke of what is necessary. Poetry she suggests is not a luxury but necessary; as necessary as bread. Audre Lorde often spoke of how she started writing because of a need to create what is not there. We fight because we dream for a more just world. Perhaps then it is the very struggle against injustice that gives us the resources we need to build more just worlds. These resources might include a certain willingness to cause trouble, to kill joy, yes, to be misfits and warriors, but they also involve humour, laughter, dance, eating and drinking, all the ways we have to nourish ourselves and each other. We are addressing each other too. When we speak to someone, we open the possibility of a return address; to and fro. Feminism: to and fro, a dialogue, a dance, a chance, what we have to do to be.

Audre Lorde teaches us that we need to keep the question of use alive not because use does not matter but because it does. Retrieved 16 March 2017. A path is kept clear through work; occupation depends upon sarah ahmed such and such xi man might become an originator of a concept, an idea as becoming seminal, by removing traces of those who were here before. She has places to go; we have places to go because others have been there. It tells us that we cannot use the toilet until whoever is using the toilet is finished using the toilet. We learn too from where documents end up.