I can make anybody pretty
I can make you believe any lie
I can make you pick a fight 
With somebody twice your size

I been known to cause a few break ups
I been known to cause a few births
I can make you new friends 
Or get you fired from Work

[1st Chorus]
And since the day I left Milwaukee 
Lynchburg and Bordeaux France
Been making the bars lots of big money
And helping white people dance
I got you in trouble in high school
But college, now that was a ball
You had some of the best times 
You'll never remember with me
Alcohol
Alcohol

I got blamed at your wedding reception
For your best man's embarrassing speech
And also for those
Naked pictures of you at the beach

I've influenced kings and world leaders
I helped Hemmingway write like he did
And I'll bet you a drink or two that I can make you
Put that lampshade on your head

[2nd Chorus]
'Cause since the day I left Milwaukee 
Lynchburg and Bordeaux France
Been making a fool out of folks just like you
And helping white people dance
I'm medicine and I am poison 
I can help you up or make you fall
You had some of the best times 
You'll never remember with me
Alcohol
Alcohol

[Repeat 1st Chorus]