2 Easy Ways to Get a Threesome

It's a phantom thought that has occurred to most people in a long-term relationship: What if we? Have some tissues by the bed and prepare to do laundry the next day.

This is the sort of stuff I discuss on my blog and in the free ebook I give out. Be casual and chill about it: Don't rush your girlfriend. Take the lead with your hands, guiding your partners into positions you want to try. Have you ever thought about that?

2 Easy Ways to Get a Threesome - Couples always seem to be having hot-and-heavy threesomes with a stranger who leaves the next morning. Regardless of how good your game is, when you ask a girl for a threesome, she will always question your motives.

Maybe it's spring in the air, maybe it's that anything-goes last month of your senior year of college, or maybe it's that you've been watching too much of that damned hot love triangles, hotter actors, is Ian Somerhalder even a real person, etc. Whatever the reason, you've decided that you want to go for it — like, it-it. The most prizewinning of sex acts: the menage-a-trois. Except, you know, we don't live in the super-chill -iverse, where threesomes — and wine and murder — are an important part of daily life. I mean, I don't even know if my neighborhood has a velvet-swathed brothel for me to shimmy into, boyfriend in tow. No, for me and for most anyone who isn't Westerosi nobility, a threesome demands a bit of foresight and planning. Maybe if there were, say, a handy how-to guide... A disclosure, before we begin: I have actually never had a threesome, and accordingly, don't consider myself qualified to dole out mid-coitus play-by-play directives. But as a 20-something women who, like, breathes and dates other 20-somethings, I've been propositioned a fair few times to partake in a menage. So, as with all things that have piqued my interest deeply — ebola, Anonymous, Cat Marnell, speakeasies — I have researched the everloving shit out of this topic. Basically, I'm here to shave five hours off your Googling time, leaving you with five hours more to canoodle, trio-style. So let's get to it! Make sure you really want this With any sexscapade — from hooking up with a rando to having the vanilla-est missionary tryst with your longtime partner on a Tuesday morning — to ensure that you're doing what you're doing for the right reasons. Is the actual reality of a threesome as attractive to you as the fantasy of one? Are you feeling secure with yourself and your partner, if you have one? Are you a baller communicator? This is just a good habit to get into generally. Discuss threesomes with your partner If you're coupled up and you really want to go for this, it's imperative to make sure that you and your partner are on the same page first. You should discuss threesomes hypothetically. You should consider threesomes as a real possibility, with real ramifications. You should bring up. You should talk until you're soooo sick of talking about threesomes that they're almost not sexy anymore — almost. And then, and only then, if you're both into the idea, you can move forward. Unless you're, like, Samantha from Sex in the City, finding and asking the right person is going to be a little awkward no matter what — just keep in mind how much fun the payoff will be. Whether you're the couple or a unicorn yes, for single women who are interested in partaking in a threesome, because you're rare and horny, I guess? These include asking friends or acquaintances if they know anyone, asking friends or acquaintances to join in, putting out an ad on Craigslist, downloading that new threesome app , hitting up a swinger's club, or approaching contenders at a bar. However you meet or find your participants, what's important is that you. Meet in person, somewhere public, before you decide to go through with anything. Talk for a little while about normal stuff, about sex stuff, about specific threesome stuff. Take safety precautions of the sexual and stranger-danger varieties. Make sure that don't wind up with Patrick Bateman in bed. And make sure you can say yes to the following questions, posed by the wise : Do you like both these people? Do you trust both these people? Do you feel ready and willing to laugh at yourself and to laugh with them if somebody farts accidentally? Can you all keep a secret? Things to think about when prepping for le menage Look, I am not naive enough to think that every beer-pong instigated hookup is preceded by an STI test. But sleeping or fooling around with someone new has its risks; three people means more risk. Like, a lot of condoms, because you should be changing condoms. I like the idea of using , coded by — a little silly, maybe, but I'd take silly over syphilis any day. Oh, and just a thought, but you might want to keep a small trash can near wherever you're getting it on. Because, I don't know, condoms everywhere, right? This last one is sort of about safety, but also concerns your emotional well-being. If your funds allow for it, you might want to consider renting a hotel room for the threesome, at least the first time. It's safer than exchanging personal addresses, it will give you a little distance from your domestic sphere like, what if the threesome is a mess, and you think about it and get bummed about it every time you crawl into bed? Not great, Bob , and it might just make you feel sexier. And, DUH, tell someone where you are. Safe, sane, and consensual, everybody!

They can still freak out at this point, but if they got this far, most of them will let it happen. Possibly, but not likely. Be Ready To Deal With Feelings Of Jealousy Threesomes are tricky because they fub up lots of complicated emotions: primarily, jealousy. There's a wide range of threesomes that one can have, and you should be prepared to discuss whatever she wants. But is this the kind of thing you really want to leave to chance. In my mind, this is the xi holy grail: genuine attraction sparks between everyone, and a fun moment impulsively turns erotic. Just saying the word threesome conveys a picture of hot shared action. Get all the details here:.